I couldn’t bring her Dad back…

to see her father

Isolated, intubated,

In the ICU, since October 

In somber,

beneath a masked face cold,

As failed I as a healer,

with degrees invalid..

Mother Nature

as if unopposed

“Please bring him back” repeats his daughter,

While for the fifth time is called a code

To resuscitate, exhausted every last measure,

Status but unchanged,

prognosis poor..

survives who and whose face we end,

obscure.. destiny, or fate if exists unsure..

Nothing but puppets threaded

We’re perhaps mere 

Her daily phone calls,

more than words,

sobs and cries..

For help she begs,

texts brimming with hopes false..

FaceTimes she with illusions,

when tremors she perceives 

as meaningful conversations

COVID 19 it is..

leaving me just as helpless,

as these families,

failure of acceptance

of its consequences..

Unjust deaths,

ongoing for months

but at times,

condolences 

to self needed more than others,

when as physicians

treatment we do worthless…

Runs COVID its course

up and down on a ride rollercoaster’s

Yesterday’s

over, tomorrow’s 

an unseen promise

But not even close

to as many as

this year’s

numbers

have I offered tissues

or wiped my own tears

fogging up those face shields

soaking those inestimable N95s..

Mandated social distance,

hearts breaking in silence,

emotions

concealed beneath gears,

Taboo though was

what we needed this year the most

A hug more than anything else

deprived but life’s 

mundane, the basics

once taken for granted by us

And unfortunately distance

alone takes precedence

A hope, that survive pandemic this

our loved ones

“Doctor”, she pleaded